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[quote=Anonymous]14:02 again: once my husbands depression was actually treated, he stopped saying resentful nasty crap to me. Because his THINKING had changed, and gone back to more what it used to be.

Depression is TRICKY and SNEAKY. It can come in gradually and be masked by other things. I know alot about the symptoms of depression, but none of those were there until it was WAY FAR GONE and had become entangled with meanspiritedness, resentment, and overall distorted perceptions. It was awful. There was nothing I could do to get him to be reasonable. Eventually I told him I could take no more and could not remain in the marriage until he sought help. Eventually he did, but I had to do all the work to get him there. Still, it was what was required.

I too like you OP take care of EVERYthing that is outside of my husbands work and including some of the support for his business. So its been a lot of strain and inequality once his depression made it so he convinced himself it was ok to demean me and act like I could do more when that was literally completely impossible.

THank goodness he is slowly but surely returning to the guy I married- it got to the point where I had almost forgotten who he used to be.[/quote]

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