Reply to I want to be the fun laid back wife. Please tell me how.

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "I want to be the fun laid back wife. Please tell me how."

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I heard something on the radio once, years ago when my kids were infant/toddler:  Always make your DH *want* to come home.

So I thought about this, and really, why would he want to come him to me handing him a honey-do list and basically getting the second shift?  Heck, he could stay at work where he doesn't get any backtalk and people do what he says without complaint, and look up to him.

I decided then and there; no more honey-do list.  I do it myself, or I hire a handyman to do what I can't.  Even when it's something he wants to do for himself (like, connect the new TV to the speakers etc, which of course, ends up getting all screwed up).  He *says* he wants to do it himself, but you know, when he comes home and it's all done and ready to go, he does not sit around complaining about how he didn't get to assemble it.
 
I don't b***h about the mess he makes.  I buy his favorite beer.  I always kiss him goodbye in the morning, and in the evening I stop what I'm doing and go kiss him hello.  (that is important; it's very primal, all social animals greet each other)

I just try and make it a nice experience for him to come home.  I want him to think of it as a hotel.

At first it's hard because it feels a little unfair.  But I just suck it up, and you let go of resentment when you see that your plan is working.

It's been about 8 years since implementing this plan, and he has said that coming home is like coming to an oasis.  Our marriage is really strong--stronger than before implementing the plan.  We have a lot of fun together!

I SAH, so obviously this plan would have to be tweaked for a dual-income couple.  But the goal is the same:  Figure out how to make your DH want to come home.[/quote]

I totally get that.  I do the same.  Mainly because my DH is laid back and not critical. If he wanted the house a certain way and expected it - I probably would not do it.  He is not perfect and neither am I.  Both of us hate discord.  We also have a high tolerance to messes etc.  We love to have a kid friendly house and we do not mind when we have to do some extra work because of having kids around.

As long as my family is safe - there is nothing to get worked up about.  I do hire people and outsource a ton of work as well.

We both are very attracted to each other sexually (even after 20+ years) and have an incredible sex life. I think great and frequent sex is a great stress relieved and really bonds a couple.

So - 1) Stop nagging  and criticizing  2) Outsource work or do it yourself  3) Do not sweat the small things   4) Have lots of enthusiastic, innovative and frequent sex!
[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics