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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you've never been through it, you have NO IDEA how incredibly difficult and painful it is.  Please, just give her time and space.  And in the meantime, if you are a believer, please pray for her.

Signed - been there, done that.  [/quote]

Yeah, pray for her while she gives you her ass to kiss. The world doesn't revolve around her infertility. [/quote]

Would you be so callous if your friend was dealing with a life-threatening illness?  What if she suffered a death in her immediate family?  Why are you making someone else's hardship about your needs?[/quote]

Exactly.  No one would dream of using the phrase "wallowing in poor me-dom" to describe someone in those situations.  It's because deep down, people (mostly those who've never experienced it) don't believe infertility is a good enough reason to experience significant grief or depression.  It isn't worthy of our compassion in the way that other tragedies are.  Instead, infertiles are told to "buck up" and "deal with it".[/quote]

What crap. We experienced infertility, IVF, multiple miscarriages and then, when we were finally pregnant, a diagnosis at 20 weeks that the baby would not live more than a few minutes after birth. Of course we experienced significant grief and depression, and anyone who tells me I just don't understand can just suck it. It's not about minimizing the grief, it's expecting people to deal with that grief in an adult manner.  And to the pp who compared infertility to getting a serious illness or losing a lived one, get real. At bottom, your not getting something you want. Something you desperately want, sure, but you're not 7. Act your age. 
[/quote]

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