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[quote=Anonymous]My ex was controlling and slyly emotionally abusive and NPD. He apologized when it suited him. He was very convincing. Everything was a game to him; he was always manipulating me and gaslighting me. He was so good at it that I didn't know until the very end. No one else suspected a thing.

So yes, abusers apologize. And they sound so good.

And Splitting became my life while he dragged out the divorce and accused me of things I would never do. Or he would take a kernel of truth - "she raised her voice after I didn't come home one night," and then he would accuse me of hitting him or something like that. It was awful and insane.

The only thing worse than my divorce would have been staying in that marriage.

I don't know if OP is out there anymore, but if this sounds familiar to anyone here, please be very careful and start to document everything and collect information. Once you leave him, all hell will break loose, and your charming H will turn into a monster. So start protecting yourself now. You'll need an airtight case in court.  I'm sure many people are rolling their eyes reading this, but millions of women go through this each year when they try to divorce a NPD abusive man.

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