Reply to WWYD? We hate the name of our foster-to-adopt child

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Reply to "WWYD? We hate the name of our foster-to-adopt child"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As someone who was almost named a very unusual (and my opinion horrible) name, I don't agree with all the other posters.  I think if a name is truly horrible and there are some truly horrible names out there, there is a case to be made that it may be beneficial for the child to live out life with a new name.

Changing one's name is not unusual. Babies adopted from other countries often get a new American name.  Adults from other countries often pick their own new first name because they realize that their original name will make life harder in ways they don't want to deal with. Many last names have been Westernized. People often change their names after marrying and divorcing.  Actors and musicians often adopt new, catchy stage names.  Some people just plain don't like their names and will change it legally to something they do like.  Original names are not sacrosanct. Not everyone is comfortable with the name they've been given, why do you think there are so many nicknames? . Though you personally may not have made the same choice to change your name under those conditions, it doesn't mean they aren't valid choices.

Not that this is necessarily the case, but if she had an abusive background, I wouldn't assume that this name is something that this little girl holds dear.  Iit may be a name she associates with being yelled at or punished.  Finding a new name might be helpful in that case.[/quote]

You aren't talking about a person making the decision to change their name, you are talking about a snotty DCUM poster who is essentially saying she is ashamed and embarrassed to be associated with a white trash name so she wants to take it away from a 4 year old child.  The only one with a problem here is OP.  Oh, and if you would bother to educate yourself on adoption, it is extremely frowned upon to change names and westernize them and the trend in doing that swung in the other direction years ago.  [/quote]

Westernizing a child's name may be frowned upon by some people, but others of us don't agree with that.   I think it is reasonable for the adoptive parents to consider how to make their child's transition to a new culture easier.  Some non-American names work well in the U.S.  Some names don't work so well for various reasons, perhaps the name sounds like a curse word, etc.  I think it's a valid choice to change a name even of a older child when the cons outweigh the pros.  It shouldn't matter, but for what it's worth, I am a minority with a multiracial spouse.  I see people who purposefully choose ethnic names for their children and reject Americanized nicknames and I see people who choose to have Americanized nicknames and name their kids very American names all the time.   Both choices are really common.  [/quote]

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