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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sounds like SIL feels obligated to buy gifts for your children because you buy for hers. Hence the lies.

If you're a gift-giver then continue to give gifts with no expectations of anything in return. If SIL gives gifts, fine. If not, fine. If they're months late, whatever. If she comes up with another story, just say "Oh don't worry about it. The kids are fine. They got tons of presents for their birthdays already." That will take the pressure off.

I suspect she may not reciprocate in the way you'd like because she may not have the money. Why else would she not buy gifts for neices and nephews when she said she had? [/quote]

I suspect she is having financial problems and her mom takes on the gifts as a way of support to maintain her pride.

Some g'mas really like to insert themselves into the relationships between siblings (especially sisters/sisters in law) and will always defend or side with their own kid.

My late MIL insisted if we sent a card or a donation when someone passed that it be sent to her house, and she'd mail it for us.  When I pointed out this was silly and we'd send it straight to the family, she was offended. She wanted her offspring to pitch in and send a group present/donation. We are talking about $10 here.

I am biased, but I really think your MIL is a puppetmaster here (even a well-meaning one) not a victim. 
[/quote]

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