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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I didn't read the whole thread, but here goes:

When my best friend was in marital counselling (they eventually divorced) their therapist told them that one of the least advertised statistical indicators for divorce in a couple is when it takes them longer than 4 years to go from starting dating to marriage. Unless there are extenuating factors (couple start dating as kids in high school, long-distance, grave illness, etc.) couples who take longer than 4 years to marry are much more likely (I don't recall the specific percentage) than those who don't.

The reason: simply put, if two grown adults in love cannot decide whether they want to marry each other, and commit to doing so, within 4 years, one or both of them is unsure about the decision.

I've never been married, but this always stuck with me. [/quote]

I believe this. I was in three long term relationships. Broke up after two, two, and four years respectively. They just never wanted to marry. I figured if they didn't know me well enough in two plus years of dating, they never were. The four-year long guy immediately asked me to marry him when I broke up with him. But who wants to get married under those circumstances?

I met a man later, and we both knew we wanted to marry within a month. (We waited 14 months to do so though, so not crazy). We've been married 10 years now.

OP stick to your guns. It might sound 1950s old fashioned, but I always knew my vision of life partner and father to my kids would also be my legal spouse. I didn't want a long term boyfriend. I'd rather be single if I couldn't be married. And I'd seen a lot of 7 year+ relationships among my friends, going nowhere fast. Not for me. I knew myself well enough to know marriage was the type of commitment I wanted. And I am very happy now being married. (Also one huge reason I'm pro marriage equality. I really believe in marriage, period).

Good luck. Sometimes the hardest choices are the best ones.[/quote]

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