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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Most men I know 35+ who are single are delusional about what they bring to the table.  They are 4-6’s who think they deserve an 8-10 woman.  Unless they are rich it’s just not attainable for them.  When they aren’t successful they just stop trying to date.  They don’t understand what their lane is and that if they stayed in it they’d find a partner.  There truly is a lid for every pot.[/quote]

This is what I see in my BIL and one of my guy friends. BIL in particular. He had a lackluster career for years and then recently quit that job and is sponging off his mom and doesn't appear to even be looking for another job. He thinks women who care about his lack of job are "shallow" but at his age (late 40s) I don't think it's about women just wanting a rich guy. I think women correctly see that he is not capable of taking care of himself, lacks the emotional maturity to deal with a regular job (like the rest of us do! my job isn't amazing but I need money so I suck it up -- this is somehow beyond him), and will be dead weight in any relationship. He did have a girlfriend for a couple years a while back when he was still employed, but he was extremely rigid and uncompromising with her and eventually she broke it off. TBH I was amazed she put up with him as long as she did.

Anyway, he will tell you that he just can't find a woman who meets his standards but the truth is that he is impossible and no one wants to date him, and as he gets older it gets worse. I think for a long time he was looking for a woman to come in and make his life nice for him -- create a nice home for him, cook and clean for him, bring in an income, make him feel good about himself, plan trips and fun activities and maintain his social life, etc. Now he's rounding on 50 and he's still waiting for some woman to come around and do all that. No one in their right mind would sign up for that, I'd rather be alone forever. But he thinks the problem is the quality of his dating pool.

Delusional.[/quote]

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