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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It sounds like he is agreeing that the children will live where they live now and visit him during summer/school breaks for an extended period of time. I would try to get that in writing as soon as possible so that you have some kind of custody agreement to work with. I would plan for him to be taking them on one of those vacations this summer, possibly a month from now, and consider this as a "plan you are making" rather than an "emotional betrayal you are experiencing."

He sounds cold and organized, which is helpful because you can be cold and organized too. Have your feelings on your own time.[/quote]

Who’s the default parent?

You don’t take kids that young away for such a long period of time.

Default is one week max and you can each prohibit international travel or require approval and safety measures. [/quote]

Maybe that is what you are comfortable with. That's up to OP and her lawyer and her STBX and his lawyer to negotiate. I don't think that 4 and 7 are too young to spend a few weeks with their dad over the summer. I think that their lives are already being upended by the divorce, which doesn't sound negotiable, and that establishing the best, normalest relationship with their dad is important. OP can ask for child support to mitigate increased childcare costs, and you are certainly welcome to disagree with me about the ages.

It is a good general idea to get consent before travel with children, from both parents. International travel requires approval, and it would be smart to have a notarized letter approving the travel, every time. But realistically speaking, I don't think there is any reason to assume the kids cannot handle spending several weeks with their dad. It sounds like one way or another, they will be spending a lot of time without one of their parents, since OP's husband has decided that he wants a divorce.[/quote]o

+1
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