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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You never know what’s truly going on in a family. When I decided to leave DH last year, all of our friends were surprised because I always “looked so happy” and they thought we are happy together.

On the other hand, people might vent to their friends making an impression of an unhappy couple but then they go home and feel quite good in general. [/quote]

So you don't have any actual friends? Because I talk to mine about things we're going through. When I got divorced none of them were shocked. [/quote]
I have a lot of actual friends. But what’s the point of complaining to them about a decision I made 20 years ago (to marry a man that I didn’t love)? I didn’t advertise it to the world that I didn’t love him and was unhappy because of that.

For example, he isn’t my type physically, and for more than 20 years, every time when I looked at him I thought how much I don’t like what his face looks like. It’s not something I’d share, and if your friend told you something like that, you’d think that they are insane. [/quote] So youre a liar and deceiver since obviously you must have faked loving him and being attracted to him to get him to marry you, for whatever the reasons were, which you conveniently omit.  All the problems in your marriage are your own fault [/quote]
Why do you feel a need to make up a story and attack a character of your fictitious story publicly? In reality, I’ve never pretended that I love him and have never said that I do. Now that I truly love my boyfriend, I have a big trouble saying that to him because I’ve literally have never ever said these words to any man - only to my children and friends. [/quote]

DP. A marriage where you never even pretended or said you loved your husband is so unusual that's it's an inappropriate place to start saying "you never know what's truly going on." Some of us (and I'm in a very different but equally rare boat myself) have strange marriages, but I don't go around projecting my unlikely experience on the world.[/quote]
I’m not projecting my experience but I’m quite sure that many people don’t go around sharing everything about themselves and their marriages.

As I said, I have a lot of friends, and a lot of people confide in me and trust me. For example, I chatted with a coworker who is a dedicated father to his two little kids, and their marriage is very strong. He asked why I moved to a different city, and I told him that I left my husband, moved, and now have a boyfriend here. And he said: “I wish my wife took our kids and went somewhere for a long time, and I could get a girlfriend”. Does that mean that his marriage is unhappy? I don’t think so. He is just tired of so many responsibilities that came with two little kids. That’s why earlier on this thread I mentioned that sometimes people just vent and then go back to their lives and don’t feel a need to change anything. [/quote]

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