Reply to Anyone else feel like their idealistic parents didn't prepare them for adulthood?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sounds like the dog is a big part of the problem and you're developing a victim mentality doubling down on prior bad choices. [/quote]

This, unfortunately. I would also point out that your obsession with this difficult dog that no one likes sounds similar to the bad choices you have made with boyfriends and friends. This bad dog loves YOU (a bit like your professor showing such interest in you, making you feel special, only to find out he could be a man who seeks out females he can have affairs with) and this bad dog loving you and clearly no one else makes you feel special. These sorts of bad characters make you feel special. I say this as someone who had a similar mindset, and NO ONE treated me with true respect until I STOPPED needing it. I was needy without realizing it, and that puts a target on your back for people who will use your neediness. I literally had the epiphany, then started reading anything I could to help myself learn to be strong.

What I think is commendable is that you are now seeing that things need to change. You need to change. As many have already said, what you are going through is a phase of life. It's the perfect time to change, strengthen the trajectory of your life. I am a big dog person, but like you, I got a problematic dog toward the end of college. My roommates told me if I didn't get rid of the dog I had to leave. It is by living that you learn the hard lessons. Most people don't even believe the lessons apply until they learn them the hard way.

So grab this new phase and know that starting now you can make a great life. And once you start on a promising path you'll know that you did it on your own.

Good luck![/quote]

That's an insightful observation. I do think I have the tendency to enjoy being "singled out" by people (professors, roommates, friends, boyfriends) as someone "special," but in retrospect, it was inevitable that all of these relationships would turn out badly if they were so terrible to others around them.

Maybe my dog is part of that pattern, but I suspect not -- she's 50/50 on being friendly to people. She was friendly to both of my former roommates and my best friend (before I had falling outs with all of them), but isn't so friendly to some of my other friends and her former dog sitter.

I do really love my dog though. She's the 1 thing I have giving me meaning in life at this point. :( [/quote]

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