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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]New poster here.

Don't read the sociopath book.

You and your husband need immediate expert advice on how to handle her and probably therapy as well. I recommend finding a therapist that can do the parent part of DBT for Children with you. We have a similar DD and shifting our behavior even 10-20% made a big difference ultimately with her behavior. Our DD is much better now and I think that is due to 1. our learning how to manage her, 2. time and maturity, 3. therapy and DBT training that DD ultimately got.[/quote]

I know nothing about DBT. Looking into it, it appears to be recommended for individuals who self harm or are suicidal, but I don’t think our daughter struggles with either of these. At least not yet. She externalizes everything. She takes no accountability. It’s all anger and blame directed at everyone around her. There is no inward anger. Do you still think it’s a solution for her?

We do plan on shifting to family therapy instead of individual therapy for her.[/quote]

DBT therapy was originally developed for teens and young adults who were at risk of self harm or suicide but it is so effective it is now used much more widely. It is great for disregulated tweens and teens if you can get them to try it. But, even if you can't, you can make a lot of progress with them by getting trained in the parent component yourself.  The therapist will spend time listening to the struggles you are having with your kid and make suggestions about how to handle different situations, give you tools to practice etc. There is even a competent where you can call the therapist on their cell in the middle of a difficult situation and receive coaching on how to handle in real time.[/quote]

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