Reply to Why are men so desperate to be dads

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My ex brought up kids before I did.  He seemed to want kids more than I did - I would have been happy to wait longer.  In retrospect, I think it was part of his predation.  Wanting kids was a form of love-bombing.  He wanted to tie me down early in the relationship in a way that would make it less likely that I would leave.  He also wanted to use the kids as a way of demonstrating to others that he was a "good guy" so he could continue his predation.

He was not a child predator.  He was a predator of single women -- serial infidelity in which he reeled in single women with a tale of being a good dad in a bad marriage.

He was quite surprised when I confronted him about the cheating only 6 months after the birth of our child, and that I kicked him out only a year later.  I think he truly thought that having kids would glue me to him.[/quote]
All of this was my experience too. Men can use kids the way they use women and everyone else in their lives.[/quote]

This isn't normal.[/quote]
It's incredibly common. Does that make it normal? Maybe not. But it happens often. [/quote]

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