Reply to I feel like I won the parenting wars

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DS was accepted ED1 to an elite university. Husband and I have worked for years to help him with grades, encouraging increased in AP classes, motivation, ec's, supporting his varsity sport, helping with the mental toughness training/support required for the sport,  requiring DS do volunteer work, etc. throughout high school.

Our parenting style differs from our siblings parenting style - they are more "live and let live." DS has also overcome struggles with anxiety and social issues (stress in his sport and around acclimating to a new HS), even us finding vape carts and getting him a therapist). A visit to the emergency room on prom after too much vodka. So many opportunities to veer too far off track.

I'm just feeling so grateful, his senior year, to be on the other side with him heading to a great school with amazing opportunities. I'm also feeling validated with our parenting style. Most importantly, DS is extremely proud of his accomplishment. He did it! We did it! Feeling proud and emotional about this next phase. Parents need to pat ourselves on the back sometimes🥹[/quote]

I'm happy your son has learned to manage anxiety and social issues and potential drug use/addiction. That is something to feel very happy about!

But there are no "parenting wars" IMO. Admission to an "elite" college is not an end unto itself, it's just one more step along the way where things can go up or down or they aren't necessarily going to find immediate happiness but will lead to new and more complex challenges than high school. And the stage after college graduation (if they graduate) leads yet again to another temporary step along the way where things can go up or down, etc. College is just one step on the long staircase of life so please don't measure your worth as a parent on something as transient as college admission. I do think you should be more proud for supporting your son on coping mechanisms for anxiety, social problems and drug use instead.[/quote]

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