Reply to Accomplished woman trying to date after a long marriage - men are drawn primarily to my caregiving abilities

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Reply to "Accomplished woman trying to date after a long marriage - men are drawn primarily to my caregiving abilities"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your post is a little confusing. The title of your post suggests that you define yourself by your accomplishments. And your first paragraph is all about that. Then you say that dating earlier iwas  all about building a family (which doesn't have to do much with professional accomplishments).

Why are you surprised that men are drawn to your personal rather than professional capabilities?  What men were ever impressed or turned on by a woman's professional accomplishments?  Of course men in their 60s on up are going to care about how good you are at caregiving, they're not interested in your ability to raise kids or build a family.

It may be that you are turning off men your own age by making them feel small.  
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OP here. That's an interesting take. No, I don't define myself by my professional accomplishments. I have mentioned that I have wide-ranging interests. I have also successfully raised and launched well-adjusted children. It's just that I'm surprised that none of that really matters; to 60+ y.o men it comes down to homemaking, caregiving, companionship and (comparative) youth.[/quote]

You don’t seem very self aware. You say you don’t define yourself by your professional accomplishments but that’s literally your title and first paragraph and only thing you say about yourself in your first post.

Now that you’ve been called on it, you drip-drop out some other details, you know, like the trolls around here.[/quote]
NP. You need to go finish your GED or handle whatever deficiency it is that has you so threatened that OP is accomplished.[/quote]

I’m a woman, an accomplished one at that. No one is threatened. It’s boring as hell to talk about your work on a date. I doubly feel that about men who do so.[/quote]
Narcissism is the only thing you're coming off as accomplished that. I don't know why you have such a hard time understanding that OP is not you and is not trying to date you. What you find boring on a date is irrelevant here. If talking about her extensive collection of marbles gathered all over the world is what will make OP fulfilled in love, then your advice should be structured towards helping her achieve that, not towards breaking her down and convincing her she has to be someone different to date the way you think is proper.[/quote]

Not PP but PP is 100% correct. And in fairness OP came here seeking advice. It is not hard to decipher what her issues in dating are when you starts off with her accomlishments lists. Men she would want to date don't care, they just don't and they don't want to talk about.
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