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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I suppose I could have kept this more general, but the question specifically relates to notice for close family members expected to participate/attend.  I have 3 DCs.  Two are already married with kids, the third just got engaged.  We are beyond thrilled.  DD wants a big summer wedding and I assumed it would be summer 2027 because many of the venues book up early.  But they are in their 40s and want to try for kids and found a venue for a weekend in June 2026.  The issue is that many of our family members need to travel in for the wedding, and it's not much notice to me.  One of my other DCs actually lives overseas with their family right now and they were just back this past summer for another family event, I'm dreading telling them because I know they were not planning to come back again next summer.  My sister (DD's godmother) is scheduled to have knee replacement surgery in the spring which could hinder her attendance.

I'm not sure how we can fit in a shower between now and then either, because people will need to travel for that as well.....

Obviously they are adults and can do what they want but I expect to contribute a small amount, roughly what I gave my other DCs, does that give me any say in the planning?[/quote]

7 months is plenty of lead time on a wedding. Your engaged DC can tell the others- it's that DC's news not yours to tell. It is incredibly interfering to tell any couple when to have a wedding based on family members and travel.  Delay it a year?  And one reason  is an aunt getting knee surgery? You get NO say in planning - we paid for a wedding, helped on logistics, couple made all decisions. Showers?  Who's hosting?  Invites go out and people don't need to travel if it's not convenient.  [/quote]

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