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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hey guys, thank you for all your feedback. DD talked to “friend” last night, and “friend” said she had no problem with DD. Although, today it seemed to have gotten worse as “friend” has completely disregarded her. DD came home crying. Planning on having a movie night today with the recommended shows you all have given. What are the next steps possible to take? Should I do something or let her handle it? [/quote]

That sounds like such a pick me. What does it mean the friend has completely disregarded her? It’s sounds like such a needy interaction to discuss if anyone has a problem with her. That’s not a reason to come home trying. You getting so involved in her teen relationships is not a good thing.[/quote]

I’m OP, and by disregard I meant ignored DD all day after both of them agreeing they did not have problems. Then, proceeded to invite the whole friend group to watch a movie tonight in front of DD. Say what you want, but I do not think being left out in your face is being a pick me. [/quote]

I absolutely disagree with PP.  your daughter did the mature thing by adtesssing it head on in a respectful way — if you have a problem with me, let’s discuss it.  The other girl denied there is a problem and then doubled down on the exclusion, showing that she’s super immature.  It may be that she can’t hold the center of his friend group.  I would not be surprised if other girls start recognizing this girl is toxic and dropping off from the group, in which case they may become friendly with your daughter again.  I think it’s important for your daughter to take the high road.  Be friendly to the other girls but don’t chase them.  Don’t feed the drama.  If anyone asks her she can say something like “I have no idea what her issue is with me.  But whatever — she can live her life and I’ll live mine.”  
I agree with others about encouraging her to find new friends in different groups and activities.  But also take advantage of this lull in peer relationships to spend more time with her, watching movies, going shopping or out for a special meal, etc.  it’s totally okay to have a period in life where you spend more time with your mom than your peers.  Don’t hyper focus on finding her friends or talking about it too much because then she’ll feel like a loser about it.  [/quote]

+1. OP- you have mentioned majority of this friend group is going elsewhere, so this “friend” will probably do this same thing to someone else, which is not okay. But, it will be a matter of time before people start realizing that this girl is toxic. Someone will eventually speak up, and everyone will go their own ways. Tell your daughter this is a part of life, losing people no matter if it’s good or bad. In fact, this is very good for your DD, because she realized that this friend group was toxic early on instead of in high school or later. She WILL make new friends, it may not be now, but eventually she will. Just spend time with her, and don’t make it seem so serious. In her world, it seems like everything has gone to shit. You want to counter that, calm her down, and distract. [/quote]

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