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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think ED makes the psychological aspect of the college process so much worse. The best way to go into the process is to not pick a dream school and feel like there are many schools on the list you love and would be happy at, but ED encourages students to pick a first choice and then fixate on one first choice school. And An ed rejection can be really hard since it is months before happier news. I watched my DC’s class go through this, and several people had very unhappy and stressful senior years after ED rejection even though in the end all of these particular kids wound up at fantastic top schools. [/quote]

it is your job as a parent to ensure this doesn't happen.  My Top student went into ED knowing that their chances were slim to none (just like everyone else).  They knew it was fine to have a top choice but they also needed to get excited about their targets and a few safeties, as they were much more likely attending one of those.  
They got Deferred ED, we let them "be upset" for 24-48 hours and then got them back involved in the process of deciding, do you want to ED2 to your next choice or wait to hear from ED1 school.  And let's get focused on the rest of the choices.  Thankfully they only had 2 more applications to do, as most schools were EA or RD due by Nov 1/15.   But we didn't let them mope around for days/weeks about the deferral.  It's not healthy.  They had a great list of reaches/targets/safeties and we got focused on those.  It did help that within the next 7 days after ED1 deferral, they got acceptance to their top safety (with great merit) and one of their top Targets.  So they knew they had excellent choices.

But it's on you as a parent to not let them get obsessed with a "Top choice", especially when the acceptance rates are single digits.  Set the expectations and focus on reality (which is you are going to a target most likely---if you create the list accurately your kid will get into 50%+ of their targets)

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Similar to what happened with our son, especially the prompt subsequent acceptance, but was more of a target.[/quote]

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