Reply to Moms who are out of the young kids phase

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Moms who are out of the young kids phase - I need your wisdom"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]#1 - this is an insufferable question. There is NO one right answer.

But also, #2
For our family, it always worked better to have a parent who didn't work. And we've done it all - one working one not, both part time, one part time, both full time.

Kids need flexibility and responsiveness. Which you never really have if you are working. Especially if you are working either a high level
Job or a low level job, both have very little autonomy.

Kids get sick, they need emotional support and guidance, they need food/rides/appointments, all things that require your physical and emotional presence. You can't hire everything out. We tried.

Parents have a bandwidth too. You can't give 100% to your job AND your family. So you end up splitting your energy in a way when no one ever really gets what they need. Especially YOU.

You can't schedule quality time. You can't control when the crisis is going to happen. You can't control when the good stuff happens either.

And this is true at EVERY AGE. (My kids are now in college)

You just have to be there. [/quote]

This is a great answer. I am the PP who worked, SAHM and am back working. I will say, the higher up I climb in my career, the less time I have for my family. It is hard when I feel a great sense of accomplishment at work, knowing the cost to my family. I do not believe I can have it all - at least not all once. Thankfully my family is supportive and my boss is family friendly. [/quote]

I think this feeling is what’s hard.   If you don’t have any plans for the money, then from your family’s perspective your work is just a really demanding and time consuming hobby.  You have to have a plan for the money that benefits your family.  It can be cool vacations or a country club where you spend your weekends, or it can be that your husband gets to work less or pursue something he is passionate about.  
You can’t just work for your own personal fulfillment and raise three kids at the same time.  I say this as a physician who gets a lot of fulfillment out of my work:  work is not that fulfilling, and there is a reason they pay you to be there.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics