Reply to Husband annoyed at taking his injured daughter to urgent care

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why does every DH have to be the main parent. You're the main parent, OP. Just do the parenting and let him do the 1billion other things that also have to get done to run a family.[/quote]

I know people are bristling at this.  But honestly, as a strategy it worked really well in my family.  I did nothing but kid stuff and my spouse did everything else except that spouse did childcare drop off and pick up because my commute was longer.  We had very little conflict because we each did our part to make the family work.  And we were both pretty happy about it.  I can't remember the last time I did yard work (besides my garden), took the car for service or an oil change, found a plumber, washed a car, cleaned my house and whatever other billion things it takes to keep a house running successfully.  Even though my kids are grown, I still don't do these things.  My spouse wasn't a bad parent, but wasn't a good caretaker until they got a lot older.  The difference between me and OP is that I could count on my spouse in emergencies.  [/quote]

Look, you are missing the whole point, likely because you can’t actually grasp what this man is doing (because your DH was probably a basically decent and non-abusive person). Go back and read what OP wrote again. She is NOT complaining about being the primary parent. She is not saying her DH needs to stay up all night changing diapers. She is describing angry, abusive behavior during crises and emergencies (the older child’s concussion; the younger child’s midnight nosebleed). No matter how much a SAHM does, she cannot prevent emergencies, children crying and getting sick at night, and the fact that yes, sometimes she will need some help at home. A man who reacts angrily to a toddler with a nosebleed has issues that go FAR beyond the household division of labor. [/quote]

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