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[quote=Anonymous]Same as a couple PPs - I masked when younger, was a people pleaser, socially anxious to some degree. I wish also I could go back and just be proud to be me. Wish I could’ve repatriated myself much earlier. But finally realizing all this in the last decade (late 40s now).  Anyway, didn’t date in HS or college but did have hook ups in college. Dated in grad school and after. But ended up marrying a guy I was set up with, after dating a couple of yrs. 
Happy now with DH and our kids. But if I could go back I would’ve dated in college- my best guy friend was interested but I was too young/naive/romantically idealist to open my mind and heart to the possibility. I wish someone could/would have given me some guidance and unsolicited advice.

As such, I have gently encouraged my HS junior DD to date…if she wants to, not turn down opportunities, not make arbitrary rules for herself, keep an open mind. I told her being friends first could be really lovely so don’t make the mistake I did by saying no just because you’re already friends. Trying to gradually tell her the realities of finding a mate… it’s not a rom-com, it may not be love at first sight, the honeymoon phase is not predictive of long term happiness.

OP- it’s definitely not too late for your DD, but I understand your concern. It doesn’t get easier to meet lots of men after schooling. Maybe try to have a heart to heart and see what might be getting in the way. Or have a therapist help. I would have appreciated my mother doing this at that age.

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