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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I always tried to date 3 men at a time until one is almost certain to propose.

It is such a waste of time to date serially. If you need to break off with one or if they break off with you, it is so much easier when you have two others going. If one does not work out, then you have to start from scratch. So I always dated and been intimate with 3 men at a time. It is small enough number that you can manage to meet with all of them once a week.

Until I was pretty sure that DH was going to propose I was dating two other men. There is no need to talk about exclusivity. It is better not discussed at all.[/quote]

Your DH proposed when you weren't dating exclusively? What an idiot. Literally a cuck.[/quote]

He probably didn't know and he just assumed she was being faithful like he was.

I can't imagine what guy would propose to a woman who would only make time for him once a week.  OP thinks she was being clever but all she did was dilute the quality of her pool to someone who was, at best, cuck-like.  [/quote]

OP here: there is a lot of other options in between of sleeping with 3 men till one proposes and exclusivity after a few dates.

My question was rather - why men who are not exclusive themselves expect women to be exclusive to them ? So they can f…k multiple chicks without condoms?

And what’s the way around this for a woman. I think I’ll be more secretive without being explicit about seeing other men. Will be saying “out with a friend”, “at a gym” etc. Kind of what all the men are doing

[/quote]

I pretty much gave you this advice before the thread got hijacked. If you aren’t exclusive, if he’s not your boyfriend, he doesn’t really have a right to know details. And if someone pushes, you can turn it into a DTR conversation if you want (“you seem very interested in my whereabouts considering we aren’t exclusive.  Should we discuss that?”) 
[/quote]

It feels weird and taxing to lie all the time. I also am not doing anything wrong. If he can't stand a thought of me seeing others while he actually is f...ing others, would he be a real equal partner for me? Or am I overthinking it?[/quote]

I dont think it’s actually lying, it’s just sharing less.  Out with a friend is fine - he has no need to know it’s a date. if he starts prying, you can flip the script on him.  I think oversharing is partly why they think they own you - it makes you seem very invested in them.[/quote]

What if a man says he doesn’t have other partners only you ? And wants to ditch condoms for that reason ?[/quote]

If you’re asking ME (the PP), then it’s time for a real exclusivity discussion, STD testing, and much more openness about your whereabouts (assuming that both are willing to be in a committed relationship).  I dont mean that the openness should be to verify he isn’t cheating, but it puts you in relationship territory.  I dont know about you, but when I go out with friends, I dont tell them what I did every other night that week… someone I’m ‘dating’ is also not entitled to that kind of info.  With a boyfriend, it’s just building trust and intimacy.  But the OP was about a guy getting kinda turfy about a girl while not being exclusive himself.  I think she was giving him too much info.  [/quote]

OP here. I had men ask to be exclusive after 2-4 weeks of meeting them. Then after STD testing (which is easy to get) we ditched condoms but I still felt something was happening on their other fronts. I do think a lot of men offer this to ditch condoms. These relationships would last 3-6 months and end with me getting UTIs, light STD like ureaplasma or BV. 
I might be paranoid but I wouldn’t want to be exclusive just for tie sex and would prefer to date at least 6 months seeing different people. I want a man to have freedom to choose, and know I was truly his best match. It’s better if he exits relationship early on (if I wasn’t the most attractive or he found me incompatible ), than commit and then have him cheat. [/quote]

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