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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My best friend of 35 years (like a sister to me) says she isn’t in love with her husband. [b]She likes him and they are friends[/b], but she isn’t in love with him and doesn’t think she can get there. She had felt this way since before they got married but they have kids and she has stayed because of them. She feels like she is at the end of her rope now - she is always sad, crying, etc and says there is no connection and she doesn’t know what to do. Her husband is very powerful (think C-suite at a billion dollar company) and his ego won’t take this well and may make her life difficult. I’m also not sure it’s the right move for her, she seems depressed and am not sure how to guide her. What advice can I give her or how can I support her? She is seeing a therapist and is open to anything but she can’t seem to get out of this cycle that she wants to leave him. 
I shouldn’t reach out to him right? I think he would be completely shocked by all of this. [/quote]

Honestly, that can go a long way. She's probably in perimenopause or having a mid-life crisis. I'm not someone who would say you should be unhappy rather than get divorced, but since she made the choice to marry and have two kids with a guy she only liked, I guess I feel like she owes it to those kids she had to try not to blow their lives up because all of a sudden she's decided she needs to movie romance. I'd hate to feel like she does, so I do feel sympathy for her, but this is also the life she consciously created, so I think she should get her depression under control. Therapy is good but she may also require medication? I would counsel against making any decisions until she feels like herself again. You know, the self who decided that being married to a friend isn't the worst thing to happen to someone. Again, I'd be sad to feel like I was married to only a friend, but again, I didn't decide to marry someone I felt that way about and she did. [/quote]

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