Reply to Do you know how much is in the family trust?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]People on this board are so paranoid about nursing home care.  Yes it can cost $100-$120k a year, but you have no other expenses once the old person is in there.  You sell the family home and cars.  The old person is not taking vacations or going out to eat.  The home even pays for the adult diapers.  At most there is like $500 a year needed to buy some toothpaste, new socks, and a couple cheap haircuts. A normal retirement savings of a few million that throws off $80-100k a year, social security, and the proceeds from the house sale will easily cover 2-3 years of nursing home care (people don’t last longer than that once they get there- it is depressing as f@ck and they die off).  Calm down about nursing home care, and continue to contribute to your 401k, and you will be fine.

To the OP - there is probably a decent nest egg in that trust, and your parents should be proud to tell you the value.  They saved like they should, and not like the whiners on this board.[/quote]

There are more out of pocket expenses - laundry, depends, haircut, nails, are extra….and if a personal care giver is needed, they can be another big expense - $20,000 a month on top of the $10,000 a month room rate. The money in the trust can quickly be spent if a parent needs that level of care for a period of time.  [/quote]

Dude.  I have been through this a few times.  That extra 20 bucks for a nail clip is not going to bust the trust.  And if you are paying an extra $20k a month for a personal caregiver you have been sold a load of goods.  At any rate, people in a reduced state don’t last long at these places -a few years tops which is not going to bankrupt the trust if you have a few million in there plus SS and the proceeds from a house.  [/quote]

NP here. Sounds like in the few times you have been through this, either the old person died while they were still able to get up out of a chair and walk with no or minimal assistance, or you were okay with leaving the old person lying in bed all day. Yes, you can do it for 120k but if you do that level of care when there is more money to spend on care so that the person does not have to lie on bed all day, you are a selfish jerk AND you are probably violating the terms of the trust because it may read that you are supposed to prioritize the current beneficiary's care over remainder men. I'm not going to leave my mom lying in a bed in wet diapers all day in a nursing home when she was trust money that could pay for an individual caregivers who can help her get out of bed, eat at a table, shower rather than bed bath, etc.[/quote]

I'm a DP but how did you get the idea individual caregivers are the only way to go? My parent is in an AL and gets laundry, someone to help her get up, her diapers changes, showers, etc. We just pay more for these services.

The cost is around $11K/month. They charge by the day so the monthly amount varies.

Parent has dementia and sleeps a lot so is not doing much--and not because they let them lie in bed all day.

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