Reply to 80 yo dad married undocumented housekeeper 6 months after my mother’s death

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm convinced estate laws need to be changed. I have so many friend who have been in this situation. Sure, dad can do whatever he wants with his money, but a lot of that money was likely OP's moms and she didn't want it going to a future wife. Or grandparents' money that they wanted to flow down to generations and not out of the family.

FWIW my grandpa was married to someone for only 2 years and she got everything. [/quote]

Thank you for sharing. This is what I am afraid of but worse she has two deceased husbands already. My dad is diabetic and chaotically disorganized. She could easily over or under dose his insulin and then off to Philippines  with his hard earned life’s work.

Not that I have to explain myself to any of uou lot but he was also an immigrant I am not opposed to immigrant. I’m opposed to my idiot dad being taken advantage of in the most clear as gin fashion with no one stopping him. He is smart, in an engineering sense. He’s a literal rocket scientist. But he is dumb I. The most grandiose practical ways. Like he pays his taxes like 5 years late because he’s busy doing math problems 24 hours a day.

No I don’t want to be his caretaker. And he does not want that either. We are not a “caretaker family”. Some are you: you know how grandma moves in with some families? My family on his side is not about this. Absolutely not. Prior to his insane marriage (which by the way no one in my family would attend, only the other disgusting old me he works with and their trophy fake wives went) to an undocumented pirate, the longstanding and well funded plan was for him to go to eventually assisted living apartment or long term care if when he needs it.

Thank you for the practical directional advice to those who commented. It’s not an unusually phenomenon I just never saw it coming, especially immediately after the death of my darling mother. [/quote]

If my children talked about me the way you’re talking about your father, I wouldn’t want to take their calls either. I prefer not to spend time with people who disrespect me like that then expect me to give them everything I spent my life working for. You and your family rejected him when you chose not to go to his wedding. You sent him a strong message: you don’t want to be around him if he’s with her. He’s responding clearly: he’d rather be with her than to throw away his daily happiness for the chance to talk on the phone with you occasionally and the honor of letting you be his sole beneficiary. [/quote]

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