Reply to found empty bottles of alcohol in teen's daughter

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Thank you everyone, I am definitely taking it seriously. I talked to her and she said that she was absolutely not drinking alone and that the cans were left over from when friends and/or boyfriend have been over.

She has not had a large gathering lately but has had individual friends (1-2 at a time) over at different points the past few weekends.  We talked about drinking rules and boundaries, health consequences. I'm not going to just accept her word blindly but will continue to monitor room, behavior etc. DH and I will talk about consequences tonight.

Some posters noted that I was blase about her drinking at parties. I think it is a very delicate balance bw completely forbidding something and talking about how to drink responsibly at parties. I'm still figuring out the right equilibrium--I do not want to go the extreme of how my mother grew up. No drinking, no dating, etc bc I felt like I had a tougher time figuring out parameters in college and I lied to my mother about everything. [/quote]

Sorry, meant to say how I grew up in an overly strict environment. I wasn't allowed to do anything, even in moderation and I felt like the end result was that I did not have a gradual introduction into adolescent life. Was a deep plunge once I went to college. [/quote]

This idea they [b]need to "learn" to drink at home with you to somehow not drink in excess later.  The evidence really doesn't support this idea.  [/b]The earlier kids start drinking the more likely they are to be problematic drinkers later on.  Not the other way around.
[/quote]

Not even close to the truth, not even anecdotally, much less statistically.  :shock:

Proper parenting is teaching how to indulge in things like alcohol, candy, carbs, diet in general, staying up late, attending parties, etc. but doing it responsibly so it doesn't affect one's health.

Perhaps you have experience with poor instruction or poor parenting, but that's a different topic.

Kids who are forbidden the fruit, alway overindulge once they are "kicked out" of the house.

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