Reply to How much financial help are you really giving your adult children?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I know people (30 plus) whose parents are paying for their down payment, co signing mortgages, paying for their grandkids braces, daycare, vacations, ivf, co signing on cars etc. a lot of these people would never admit to how much parental help they are getting despite having “good” jobs. [/quote]

From my parents we got $10000 towards the house down payment and they put around $500 per year per child in my children's 529s. My ILs gave us $1000 at the wedding and not a dollar since that.
Just yesterday my parents said that after meeting with a financial advisor they want to give us more money to avoid taxes. They informed me that the first gift will be for a certain home improvement they want me to have, and they have certain stipulations for the work that will be done! I said PLEASE just put the money in the kids' education funds but they don't want to do this for some reason. [/quote]

You are heading down a slippery slope. I would decline and maybe push back nicely that you’re happy to invest any gifts for the next generation but are uncomfortable having them pay for your adult needs that you can save for. [/quote]

My mom feels that helping us with kids' education (ie. taking a line item out of our budget) is no good because it will cause my husband to become complacent and not go for promotions/raises. She specifically stated that he hasn't been promoted in a few years and "Where's his drive?" However a discrete gift that is earmarked for something she wants me, as her daughter, to have is ok.
I told her to keep the money.[/quote]

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