Reply to Is this emotionally abusive/mean ?

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[quote=Anonymous]How is she controlling you exactly? I will say that if you live under her roof as an adult and she pays your bills/expenses, then she is allowed to have some rules and expectations for you. Is this what you are calling control, or something out of the ordinary?

And is she saying this in the context of you abstractly saying you'll move out, but with no specific plan? Because I could see how frustrating that would be. You want to be taken care of and you also say you want her to enable you by saying you are capable as you are not making capable choices. It's a mind-twisting request and she is going out to avoid blowing up which is not a bad way of dealing.

Time to stop blaming her and take action with very specific steps in terms of job and finding a place to live. If that is not possible for whatever reasons (mental health or other limitations) then please consider reframing your views of your mom in light of the above. You are lucky you are able to live at home and might need a mindset switch.[/quote]

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