Reply to Is this emotionally abusive/mean ?

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[quote=Anonymous]From all your writings, it seems that you and your mother (and perhaps other relatives) aren't fully healthy mentally. Your mother has identified weaknesses in your make-up that concern her about your ability to be fully independent. And nastily, she points it out. You get upset because deep down, you are afraid that she's right.

Do you have ADHD, OP? ADHD is very common, and it often comes with anxiety, feelings of insecurity, etc. If you have ADHD and the executive disorder that comes with it, it's hard for you to get organized, follow-through with a life plan, be efficient, etc. And of course you can get very anxious about your levels of performance, which will make you lash out, or say nasty things, such as threats to move out (which are ridiculous, either you move out or you don't).

So you need to understand WHY you act the way you do. Maybe you could be evaluated by a psychologist, and see where you are. Maybe you'd benefit from ADHD meds, to help you focus. Maybe you need therapy, but be careful not to use therapy as an excuse to complain to someone about others without gaining insight into your mental make-up.

But I hope you understand that your current dynamic with your mother isn't healthy, and that you contribute to it just as much as your mother contributes to it. You can't change your mother, but you CAN change yourself!
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