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[quote=Anonymous]Ok. I’m the poster who was in a similar situation. Could you afford a second space where you guys trade off sleeping? You will need this anyway if you divorce.

When I mentioned my miserable 18 months, this is where I got to. I looked at studios to figure out if I could afford to rent one to just go sleep there every other night. I told my husband that I didn’t want a divorce, I just needed somewhere to get sleep that wasn’t so broken up. I ended up not having to do that for a bunch of reasons and then finally at age 14 she started sleeping through the night (as long as we give her 5 meds). But she will require 24/7 care forever. You can justify the second space as a sleep mechanism but it also gives you some breathing room. My plan was to leave after bedtime and come home before my NT kid got up.

My kid has also been on abilify, seroquel, etc. we went to abilify after she literally screamed all waking hours for more than a year. The one thing we have going for us is that her ID is so profound, she cannot really figure out how to unlock things, etc. I paid a contractor to put in locks on all the cabinets and drawers with a remote control keypad that opens them. She isn’t capable of figuring out the code. Knives are locked up. We have the doorknob turned around on her room and we lock her in once she is asleep. We get up with her, but we just need to few minutes or her locked in to hear her waking up, go to the bathroom, and sort of “steel ourselves” for the being up for hours (which is now better but took years). We also put a TV in her room mounted up on the wall that we would turn on, lock her in and go back to sleep. You are in survival mode. Do whatever you can. Don’t let people give you crap about screen time if it makes life more bearable (but if turning it off leads to violence that may not be an option for you).

We bought a chair with a belt to keep her in when I have the oven on. She is a major good seeker and will open the oven when it is 500 degrees to pull out food. She is cognitively 9 months old so she cannot figure out how to
Unbuckle it.

I realize these ideas may not work for you, because your kid is cognitively higher functioning, I think. But I am just trying to throw out all ideas in case something might work.

Overall, I just want to say I’m sorry. This isn’t the picture of parenting that any of us had. It is also batshit crazy that your kid isn’t getting a 1:1 aide from the school, but I’m not sure if you have money to fight that battle. I would advocate for a more restrictive environment potentially. My daughter is in a room with 9 kids and 4 adults.[/quote]

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