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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I SAH for five years, then tried to go back. It wasn’t for our family, so I transitioned to part time work. I miss working more because I love my job, but my kid has multiple special needs. Even though he’s doing “better”, it’s only because I’m constantly doing lots of therapies. If I hadn’t put the time in, he wouldn’t be doing well at all. I hope to ramp up my hours in a couple years, but of course now the other child is struggling. Some days, it makes me feel like my face is melting off, but I imagine that if you’re not parenting special needs children, it would be easier and more fun. Even if I never go back fully, I don’t regret taking the time off. My DH has good character, and I put our relationship even before our kids. We’ve both had years of therapy and are from an emotionally healthy place. [/quote]

I think you did absolutely the right thing for your children.

When my kids were little, we used to live in a condo and were friendly with other parents of children the same age in the building. There was a family with a high-powered couple (law partner and investment banker) who worked a lot and had a little boy with developmental delays whom they entrusted to the care of a nanny. We saw the nanny with this little guy a lot at classes for tots and the playground. I didn't think the nanny was "bad", but she wasn't really attentive to the kid.

One day, one of the grandmothers came from abroad to spend six months with the family and spent a lot of time interacting with her grandson in a way the nanny never did. We noticed him making a lot of progress during that period and generally looking happier. Then the grandma left and things went back to the not-so-great "usual" with the nanny.

I did have a respectful conversation with the mom a few months later to share my observations of what I saw in the kid when the grandma was around vs. the situation with the nanny before and after. They moved not too long after that and we lost touch so I don't know if they found a way to get him more stimulation and interaction.[/quote]

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