Reply to What should college dc be told about our divorce? DH is cheating and leaving to pursue a relationship with his mistress.

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "What should college dc be told about our divorce? DH is cheating and leaving to pursue a relationship with his mistress."

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am floored by the cruel responses here to OP. This is not “just” the guy deciding he wants someone else and breaking off a long marriage. That’s bad enough but can at least happen ethically. It’s also the cheating and lying from someone you always trusted, to whom you made a commitment. Ridiculous to talk about letting an affair smolder. Who can live like that? Ask me how I know.  Last point: people who behave like this are betraying not only their spouse but their entire family.  Think about it.  Lie to and devalue your wife, you’re also lying to and devaluing your children. Because adult children, as one PP said, are smart. A child who loves their mother will not accept what amounts to emotional abuse.  Want to end it, sure! Stuff happens, people change etc.  But don’t destroy your spouse’s self-worth with lying, cheating and gaslighting (so so common - OP, go see chumplady.com.  [/quote]

I agree that the chump lady website is helpful.

But you’re gonna have to get a thicker skin if you’re gonna post on this board.

You have to realize a lot of people posting are going to be other women, praying and hoping that their husbands leave their wives.

I think the original poster is smart enough to know when she’s talking to an intelligent, thoughtful person and a psycho other woman.[/quote]

My skin is pretty thick. I have a good support system. I've had a lot of therapy in my life. Relationships don't implode in a vacuum. I'm not going to beat myself up and I'm not going to be a victim but there are some very serious, real, ugly consequences to this and it's going to be my job to manage the cleanup because he simply is not capable. [/quote]

I agree but when my life imploded I thought hmm this doesn’t make sense.

Ended up my ex has PTSD and I got him help
Because the most important thing is the kids have a healthy parents.

Now your STBX might just be a plain ole narcissist and your kid is gonna have to learn to live with that.[/quote]

How do you get help for someone who refuses help?... I have suggested many times through the years that dh get a therapist. I've had many in my life, thank God, because each one brought different nuggets of wisdom along the way. He sees therapy as something weak people do. Which, as I write that, lol...I guess he's perceived me as weak for 30 years... :P [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics