Reply to 9yo DD left off invitation WWYD?

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[quote=Anonymous]BAR, not BAT - perhaps THAT'S the difference?

[quote=Anonymous]Any thought on how to handle this situation?
Our neighbors are terrific, nice people. Our DS and their DS are close in age and have been buddies since they were 6 years old. We just got an invite from the neighbor for the son's Bar Mitzvah. It was specifically addressed to DH, DS and me. Our 9yo DD was not on the invite. When their older son had his Bar Mitzvah our DD was not invited (the neighbor told me she would not be inviting her as she was only 2yo at the time and 'there will be nothing for her to do there'). I was fine with that, she was barely 2 and its not like she would have a great time.

However, this time she is 9, she saw the invitation as soon as it came, she read it and is now really excited to be going, she loves the neighbor kid, she's talking about getting a new dress, and looking forward to going.

1) I feel uncomfortable asking the neighbor to include her, I would feel like she would be compelled to tell me to bring her but if they wanted her there in the first place they would have invited her.
2) I do feel a little slighted that the whole family was invited except her (like I said, I understood last time, she was really young
3) If we don't go, my neighbor's feelings will be hurt, the boys are really close
4) DH will be furious and won't go without DD, it will certainly impact the friendship we have with the neighbors. In our culture (DH is not American born), this is a huge slight and insult.

I don't know if I should talk to her, just make up an excuse to not go, or what.
Any thoughts?[/quote][/quote]

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