Reply to Are these comments typical for the age, or is my DD a jerk?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's normal, but it's not kind and that's what you need to teach her.  It's normal for society to use others to get ahead but it's not right. [/quote]
It's not normal to me. How does a 7 year old learn to be that nasty? [/quote]

Op here. I guess I don’t think of those types of comments my DD made as extreme…? Unkind and rude, but not nasty.

Kids have told my kid they would kill her, that they won’t be her friend, she can’t play with them because she’s not a friend, or that her xyz is stupid and dumb. Not often, but I do hear comments like this. I don’t think any of those comments are ok. [/quote]

They're nasty. These kids make my kids upset and they come home and cry often. I've often wondered what parents would think if they heard how negative they are at school and how they kill the vibe for everyone but it's what I expected. "It's not that bad!" Yes, it is. These kids bring everyone down. Tell her to knock it off.[/quote]

My kid holds it together at school, and then at bedtime all the hurts come tumbling out.

At 7/8 - a lot of kids (including my own) said rude things - and a lot of times upon further investigation it turned out that the unkindnesses went back and forth and it was a crap shoot as to who started it (and usually it was a misunderstanding).  And by the end of the day or the next day, everyone was friends again

What all of the PPs are trying to tell you is at your DDs age - it’s not unusual to be rude to classmates, and while it’s likely her friends and classmates won’t hold grudges for long - that window will close and in 2 years if your DD is consistently mean and nasty, she’ll have a hard time keeping friends, which typically makes a 10 year old even more mean. 
[/quote]

I have an 8 and 10 yr old. My 10yr old DD has been hearing this stuff for years. It really started in 1st grade and it's still going strong in 4th it just gets a little more sophisticated. The comments are said under the breath, out of earshot, and they get more breathtakingly cruel. But, it's the same kids who were doing it back in 1st. The nice kids..... are still nice. [/quote]

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