Reply to Want to raise happy, successful kids? ‘Wait as long as possible’ to give them a phone’ (Yale)

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This comes directly from an expert at Yale:

- if you gave your kid a phone between ages 8 to 12, you did it wrong and need to take the phone away.

https://www.cnbc.com/2023/10/23/wait-as-long-as-possible-to-give-kids-a-phone-yale-psychology-expert.html[/quote]

Oh, well if it’s from an “expert at Yale”. . . .

Sure it’s an opportunity cost to leave your kid on a phone for hours on end, but there are benefits.  Like knowing when and which door to pick my kid up after their several hours of sport and after school activities - where they aren’t glued to their phones.  There are no pay phones like back in our day.  Also, you will see the age and restriction level shift drastically depending on which “expert” is flapping their gob.  The only thing they can agree on is limit usage and monitor content.

no need to “take the phone away” unless you are just insecure and have a knee jerk reaction to every piece of advice.[/quote]

No pay phones?  How many times in you childhood did you call your parents on a pay phone?

You arranged to get picked up after practice outside of door 4 at 6:15.  If you were late, they would wait for you.  If they were late, you would wait for them.

Have people just lost their minds?  [/quote]

Dating myself here, but I always tried to scrounge up quarters before going to the mall or movies so I could call my parents from the pay phone to arrange pick up. It was 50 cents. Wasn't necessary for after sports practice or other activities with a super clear end time, but for looser hangouts, I used it all the time!

I do think that the prevalence of phones makes us expect instant contact more than may be necessary, though. Next year my fourth grader will probably have to walk himself home from school once a week due to work conflicts (one parent will be working from home but has a recurring meeting at dismissal time). I've been thinking we need a "dumb phone" for him in case something goes wrong at the playground or on that one block walk, because his friends who do that have smart watches to contact their parents, but...do we really? [/quote]

I don't think you need a phone.  Our third grader walks two blocks home by herself three days a week and lets herself in the house because I have a meeting at school dismissal time.  I told her that if she's not in the door by 4:05 (3:51 dismissal), then I'll go looking for her.  She hasn't ever been late.  She knows so many of our neighbors and has countless people to help if something went sideways. No phone needed. [/quote]

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