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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You're right I don't understand what you're saying.  You don't want someone with children and you don't see it working out with this person.  But you want it to work out with someone sooner than later.  So what in the world are you doing with him other than sex and sippin wine?[/quote]

I don't want what he wants either: he has a child at home and can't offer me the partnership I want. I don't mind going out with him, sleeping with him exclusively if we are a good fit in that area - TBD (there is a huge wellness component in sex for me), having interesting conversations, enjoying joint hobbies and maybe some short trips out of town.  But I want him to understand that if someone else asks me out, I'm officially single and within my right to do so. Until I'm  married, I'm a free bird, for any man. I'm only faithful if I want to, and I promised to be exclusive, not because I owe anyone anything.[/quote]

OP you are confusing. You should say you're not looking for anything serious and not ready to settle down, but you enjoy his company. That's the only fair, decent thing to do. If he likes it, he'll take it, but he may decide that's not what he wants, which is also fair and you both can move on.

But you also might look into open relationships or polyamory - you basically are insisting that's the lifestyle you want but not calling it that.[/quote]

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