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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Men vary as caregivers. Most are innatentive, incompetent, not paying close enough attention, flouting the rules, etc. they do the bare minimum. They don't have patience. They yell  they don't care about routine, baths, and illnesses like pink eye or rash. Yet during divorce they don't want to pay child support and sthink without their wife around they'll manage fine with 50/50. What a crappy situation for the kids and the poor mothers having to worry [/quote]A newly divorced dad at our elementary school sent his 6 yo to school in tights and a t shirt, with no pants or skirt.  You could see her underwear.  They had to send her to the office to get something from lost and found.  Apparently he didn't know the difference between tights and leggings.  :roll: [/quote]

I can believe it! While my ex and I have a good co-parenting relationship, he remains a ding dong. I'm the one who gets the emails about dress code violations when he puts our child in non uniform items to go to the school they've been going to for three years. And I have to remind him about things like brushing their hair. It could be worse, but it is a difference.[/quote]

If those are your worst complaints it sounds like he’s doing a good job.  [/quote]

They aren't my worst complaints...but in general he does ok. I do remind about things like brushing hair and giving allergy meds. Even when you have 50/50 time, you're still their mother/father 100% of the time![/quote]

You sound incredibly petty.  [/quote]

I’m a DP but you, PP, sound like you don’t know much about raising school-age children.

Kid comes to school without uniform and gets violations because their dad can’t dress them? Has a “discipline problem” at school. Depending on the discipline structure at school that means various consequences like missing pizza parties or other privileges. You really think a kid whose parents are splitting needs a harder life?

Kid comes to school without allergy medicine and either spends the day miserable or the nurse calls a parent (probably not dad) to disrupt their day and bring the meds. You think that’s better for learning?

Kid shows up without even brushed hair? Best case the other kids are awful to her— and again you feel like that’s something a kid with divorced parents needs?— worst case the teachers are all gossiping about how X Family is neglectful.

They’ve studied this pretty rigorously that well groomed children get more attention in school. Your kid doesn’t even have their hair brushed? As an elementary school teacher said to me once— teachers don’t think it’s their job to care more than the parents. [/quote]

Pp here - thank you, you understand. I am the parent who gets the emails and calls about the issue. I am helping my dc with self care skills so at some point this won't be an issue. Thankfully, ex is open to reminders. I also dialogue with the school. Like I posted - we're parents 100% of the time.[/quote]

Then tell them it's dad's day and call dad.  Here is the number.[/quote]

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