Reply to DH was a huge jerk to me today and I don't know what to do next

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Reply to "DH was a huge jerk to me today and I don't know what to do next"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You are about as much to blame for what happened on Friday as he is. Sure he started it but you escalated the situation, which was completely unnecessary. That is absolutely no excuse for him calling you names, but I think if it were me I would start by owning and apologizing for my role in what happened. He told you he wanted it moved and you said you like it where it is, like that's the end of the conversation. Also, if you read what you wrote, you said that after your work call you went to go call him out on what he had done. So yeah, you need to own what you did.

A few weeks ago my husband made two sort of snippy comments - nothing big, but like with your husband, totally out of character for him. The first one I let go and after the second one I stopped what I was doing and I asked him if something was wrong or if he was angry with me about something. I did explain how I felt about his reaction to me, but because it was so unexpected, I put my feelings aside first and tried to help him figure out what's going on (it was a work thing).

I feel like in your case you really made sure your husband knew exactly how bad he had made you feel about calling you lazy, and I'm not saying that he should have called you that or that you should have bottled up your own feelings about it, but after the second incident, perhaps it was time to take a back seat and try to figure out what's going on with him instead of placing your own feelings at the forefront (note: your feelings are still valid and can be discussed, but perhaps what's going on with him takes priority right now). You sound like you have to "win" all the time with him, and I'm wondering if that's how he feels and he's sick of it.

I'll also note that after an argument you said he needs space and you chase him down. I get that, I also want to get things resolved ASAP, but you're being really selfish if you don't realize that that's not helping him at all. It's doing things your way. And it sounds like maybe he's a bit tired of that dynamic after 10 years.[/quote]

In the first post, right at the top, OP says he is good at prioritizing her needs. I don’t get from any of her posts that she is able to prioritize his needs. [/quote]

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