Reply to Anybody not want kids but have them anyway? (TTC and unsure)

Forum Index » Infants, Toddlers, & Preschoolers

Reply to "Anybody not want kids but have them anyway? (TTC and unsure)"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here, thanks for the chance to clarify.  I don't hate kids, but I don't think they're fun or cute.  I am an introvert (even as a kid, I preferred imagination games by myself rather than with others) and need a lot of quiet time.  The best example I can give is that I love sitting quietly with my dog, but I don't like to play fetch or wrestle with her: my husband plays with her and talks to her, and I schedule the vet appointments and research the best kibble.

I also have [b]a deep visceral fear of all things reproductive -- thanks, Catholic school sex ed! -- [/b]and it took years just to get over my fear of sex; pregnancy terrifies me.  I imagine it's fairly common for FTMs to be scared of the unknown, but this is pretty crippling and has lasted my whole life.
[/quote]

OP, I have not read the whole thread, but this stuck out to me as very important.  I think you need to address this first.  Have you ever heard of Theology of the Body?  Because the Church's perspective on sex is only positive.  If you were taught otherwise, you need to revisit what seems to be an essential part of your perspective on childbearing.

I find everything about sex and birth to be gorgeous, awesome, powerful, the greatest gift.  Part of it is my temperament, but most of it is my faith, my belief about what sex really means.  As someone who takes care of women during pregnancy and labor, I have seen time and again how much a woman's A.  Relationship with her husband and B.  Assumptions about sex affect her experience of having a child.

So start there.  Your TTC sounds too mechanistic, like you are trying to create a product that your husband wants.  Children are gifts, not things.  They are persons, not acquisitions.  You need to investigate the deeper questions first, before trying to "make a baby.". Because we do not "make babies.". We participate in creation, and allow our love to be so strong, so trusting, so complete, that a whole new human being who has never been before and never will be again comes into being.

I hope you and your husband grow even closer through this.[/quote]

Ignore this, OP.  She is a nut job.

Signed,
a Catholic, too[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics