Reply to Wife resents me for not making a higher income

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My wife and I have the perfect relationship until it comes to money. She has always had the expectation or hope that I be the primary breadwinner and work to give her the UMC life she feels she deserves. I have worked for 9 years now and my income has gone from 50k to 300k to now 60k again. I have spent most of the past decade in low earning roles and spinning my wheels professionally.

My wife’s income has steadily increased from 40k to $120k now. She feels our incomes combined would not make for a feasible lifestyle for children. She wants me to increase my income but I truly don’t know how. I have a liberal arts education and cannot go back to be a doctor or a lawyer.

I am increasingly fed up of being told I’m not making enough and it’s effecting my marriage. [/quote]

Leave her before she leaves you for someone else. Set her free so she can find someone who can earn more. [b]I’m sure she has sooooo much to bring the table.[/b] [/quote]

This is how I feel.  Who are these "prize" wives who think they "deserve" so much more?  And why can't those wives generate more income?  My God, did you promise her that you would be rich?  Because I don't know any grown men that do so, and I personally think YOU deserve better, OP.  "In sickness and in health, for richer and poorer..."

What does she bring to the table, that she "deserves" so much?  We all work hard, some are born luckier than others.

According to the women of DCUM, they are all supermodels that carry three kids on one arm, while vacuuming their 20k manse with the other arm, and cleaning top to bottom daily, all while providing fresh cooked home grown meals daily, and year round, regardless of the weather, while tilling acres of soil, all without hiring one bit of help. Pulease. IRL, they sit in bed all day watching last night's late night talk show reruns. GMAFB.

What kind of woman do these men marry, that they think they are "worth" so much?  For what? To keep up with the Joneses? Let them try! On their own!
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It looks like OPs spouse would not have a problem on her own since she’s bringing in 2x his salary.

But I would turn your worldview on its head.

Who do you think *isn’t* entitled to financial security before having children?

Who *isn’t* entitled to go through the risks of pregnancy without worrying that if she gets HG, needs to be on bedrest, or has other complications that make it impossible to work that she won’t be [i]losing her health insurance?[/i]

Who isn’t entitled to recover from the physical rigors of childbirth without worrying their family can’t afford the home they live in?

This isn’t some kind of Princess fantasy— OPs wife looks like she wants the absolute bare minimum of security for herself and her child and I ask you again: who ISN’T entitled to that?[/quote]

Well said. Get some hustle, OP.[/quote]

Literally no one is entitled to that. Tons of people don’t have it. And it’s a terrible situation. These are must-haves for a lot of people and in an ideal world everyone would have them, but they don’t just fall in your lap as an entitlement. You have to work for them and make them happen. OP, get a grip. Your wife is right and she has a hard decision to make.[/quote]

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