Reply to Why do SILs hate the women their brothers marry?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A common scenario I see is that a brother and sister are close, and that (healthy) closeness threatens his new partner if she has a personality disorder.  She wants to limit his close relationships with other women, even his sister and mother.  That way it’s much easier to control and gaslight him.

So many times SILs hate the women their brothers marry because their brothers marry toxic women.

Of course,[b] this does not apply if the guy’s sister is the toxic/controlling one.[/b][/quote]

This. Some women enjoy the status quo of controlling (sometimes to the point of abuse) their siblings in whatever fashion, and when a new woman comes into the picture and sees and calls them on it, it is never good for the one who reaps the benefits (SIL) of the status quo, no matter how toxic the status quo is. We tried helping SIL, until we just could not do it any more, because her toxic qualities spilled over and affected matters way beyond DH and I. Of course, SIL did not like the change, because she had everything the way she wanted it, even if it adversely affected others, she only cared about herself. [/quote]

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