Reply to Nanny on the phone ALL the time. How do I talk to her about it?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This post brought out some crazies!

OP, I had a summer sitter (college student) like this.  It broke my heart, she was clearly addicted to her phone.  I love her dearly but wow.  She probably looked at her phone every 3 minutes.  Never about Ukraine, it was TikTok, SnapChat, etc.

In my case, I just let it slide because my kids could entertain themselves and she was otherwise the sweetest young woman and a very good babysitter.

I wouldn't bring it up to your nanny.  She is likely addicted, and will just quit if you try to restrain her usage.

Instead, I'd start with this:  is her phone usage detrimental to your child?  Research shows that caregivers (including parents) on phones has a negative impact on children.  Kids are begging to get their parents' attention.  But if your child is getting the attention she needs from you, her teachers, etc... it might not matter that her afternoon sitter isn't really paying attention to her.  If your child isn't bothered by it, don't worry about it.  Just make sure your child has lots of activities she can do independently.

However, if the phone usage is detrimental to your child's well being - like your child is looking for connection and is being shut down in favor of a smartphone - it's a no brainer - get a new nanny!

Best of luck mama.
[/quote]

Thank you. Yes, my daughter says “she doesn’t want to be with me, she looks on her phone” [/quote]

I think it’s time for a frank convo with this nanny, something like “I’ve brought this up before and you brushed it off, but the phone usage is impacting Kid #3 wanting to play with you bc it’s obvious that your attention is divided.” See what she says and what she offers. I think the “phone is on the charger, only for emergencies, and we will get a house phone to call if we need to reach you.” Given your situation, if you had to switch caregivers or had a gap, I think you could handle it for a few weeks given the situation (if you needed after school childcare bc you were both seeing patients I would have a different take). [/quote]

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