Reply to No Halloween plans

Forum Index » Tweens and Teens

Reply to "No Halloween plans"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you have a neighbor child who doesn’t have tons of friends, they’d probably love an invitation. You could cast a wider net.[/quote]
This is always the answer. In middle school  kids get really independent and cliquey, they don't want to "include everyone" as much as they used to. I hate it too but I think they should be allowed to have their small chosen groups and those who don't want that route should have front yard parties that still include everyone. Chances are they all circle back to each other by the end of the night or separate for logistical disagreements. [/quote]

This is when parents need to parent and teach their kids to be inclusive instead of cliquey, little a-holes. I feel like I am one of the only parents who does this and it's sh-----y. Lots of talk of kindness and mental health on these boards yet we just let kids continue with the same mean, clique crap that has existed forever.

Do better. [/quote]

I know, right? Teasing, bullying, clique group behavior has never been good, but some hoe it's accepted. How do parents not know their kid is doing this? And if they do, why don't they do anything about it?[/quote]

Parents absolutely know. Social inclusion efforts at our school sounded really good on paper and blew up when they tried to implement them in real life. Actual feedback from parents: “my kids shouldn’t have to be [b]nice[/b] to people who they don’t like.”[/quote]

Of course you should be nice, kind and respectful.

But is it really that hard to distinguish between telling your kid "be friendly; be kind" and "I'm going to force you to spend the next 3 hours doing an activity you've been looking forward to with a kid you either don't know, or don't enjoy spending time with"

I expect my kids to be helpful, kind and respectful to EVERYONE.  But I'm not going to force them to spend time with someone that the don't know or don't like.  [/quote]

parent of kid who struggled in middle school here - kids SHOULD make their own plans with their own friends, i would never expect a bunch of 12 year olds to keep track and make sure everyone had a group to go trick or treating with.  kids struggling in the halloween buildup (as mine did years ago) doesn't mean anyone is being exclusive, it just means kids gravitate to the other kids they spend the most time with and so the "floaters" may not know where to land. It's okay, it really is part of growing up for some kids, it's brutal as a parent but it doesn't mean anyone is being intentionally unkind[/quote]

I agree.

But for some reasons, many posters on here are saying that these kids that don't send out blanket invitations lack empathy.  And that the parents are even worse.

I think those parents are a little delusional.  It's backwards to expect people to roll out of the red carpet for your child [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics