Reply to Just accepting unequal division of labor

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[quote=Anonymous]I am an adult with ADHD AND an introvert who needs alone time - and neither is an excuse for not pulling my weight at home.

If he doesn’t already, he needs meds and routines/systems. He may benefit from executive functioning coaching. The crap part is that you also may need to change the way you do some things to support him. My husband resists certain things (like the way I prefer him to add calendar items to our schedule). He thought I was messing stuff up because I didn’t care or wasn’t trying - but I literally could not understand or remember his way. He finally accepted that supporting me to be successful benefits both of us because I can take on more admin tasks and not drop the ball. 
For me, it’s little stuff. I need him to “invite” me to events on MY calendar and not expect me to use multiple calendars. He needs to ask me questions and make plans mid-morning when my meds kick in, not at 10pm when my meds have worn off. We each have chores and kid items that we prefer or are better at - we try to lean into our individual strengths instead of trying to be someone we are not. [/quote]

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