Reply to Husband wants to move out of DMV but my job is here

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Can you spend some time visiting some exurbs on the weekends? Maybe he’ll be more open to it as a compromise once he’s explored them.[/quote]

I agree this is a good idea.

One thing I see in this thread is people who are treating the DMV as a monolith when it's very much not. There's a lot of diversity of setting. Some things, like traffic and to some extent the sorts of people who live here, are fairly consistent. But like the post from the person who hated being around so many people -- move to a less dense part of the region. It's not like you are required to live in a row home or townhouse here. Even on a smaller budget, you could move to Frederick or parts of Howard County or Front Royal or Southern Maryland, that are still commutable to the city but not dense at all. There is a ton of nature here. There are places with a small town feel. And so on.

I think one thing people do is dismiss places they've never been because they've heard one negative thing and assume it sucks. But there are negative things about EVERYWHERE including the rural places far away from here that OP's DH wants to move to. People in the DMV are competitive and can be highly critical, so of course you've heard some negative thing about each and every part of this region, including the one you currently live in. You just have to find the place where the negative thing doesn't bother you that much. Like people say Takoma Park is too progressive/crunchy, but that's perfect for progressive/crunchy people. There are areas further out that are too conservative for some people, but are just right for others. There may very well be a spot for you guys, you just haven't found it yet.

I do think that living in DC proper when you don't want to be in an urban area is probably the worst possible choice. I think your DH needs to be more open minded about the region because there are huge advantages to you staying in your job (including your happiness, but also financial reasons). But I think you might need to let go of the idea that you guys can't possibly give up your low mortgage rate. If you own in DC, you can sell at a premium now and have some money to spend, especially in exurbs. A 5-6% interest rate with a sizable down payment is really not some travesty.[/quote]

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