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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Have lived on the hill a decade now with no plans to leave - [b]DH is obsessed with being in the city[/b] and we can't afford upper NW so for the foreseeable future we plan to stay in our townhouse. Both kids are in a DCI feeder school so we are putting all our eggs in the DCI basket. Will try for one of the Latin campuses in 6th if we don't get into DCI.[/quote]

You should prod DH on whether he really believes that people really he cool because he lives near the federal government.[/quote]

I am the PP who is moving and my DH was like this too, and actually it really is worth it to unpack why one or both partners are very attached to living "in the city." For my DH, he had this idea that moving outside the city was moving backwards because he'd lived in the suburbs in his 20s before finally moving into DC and being much happier to be close to friends and things to do. He moved into DC around the time we met, and he associates moving into DC as the time his life got really good.

But that was over a decade ago, before we married, owned a home, or had kids. When I'd suggest moving, he'd talk about how lonely he was in the burbs and how much less lonely his is now, and it took some time for me to convince him that living in a 1-bedroom apartment in the suburbs at the age of 26 is a totally different deal than living in a 3 bedroom house with your wife and family in your 40s. I actually think that potentially we will be more social and go out more once we move, because our lifestyle will be more in line with neighbors and also the lower cost of living will leave more money for babysitters and date nights.

It is somewhat comical how long it took to convince him of this but eventually he came around. But yes, initially he was incredibly attached to staying in the city, like if he left it would be some kind of tragedy. We're talking about moving 30 minutes away to a close-in suburb![/quote]

Different strokes for different folks.

My sister and her DH are home homebodies and burbs would fit them fine.

Whereas we do a lot of things in the city with dining out, Kennedy center, theater, concerts, family friendly activities in the city.  Even if we moved just 1/2 hour outside, there is no way we would do 2/3rd of the things we would do because of the hassle of driving into the city.

It’s much easier though because we have only 1 and more time for outside interests/hobbies/friends and don’t need a huge place.

[/quote]

I agree different strokes but you make it sound like all city people go out a lot and the suburbs are just for staying home. This is a weird binary. Everyone I know in the suburbs goes out a ton. It's just more likely to be stuff like an evening bike ride with kids, a backyard BBQ with other families, hiking nearby, etc.

Not all suburbs are huge and sprawling with big houses either. I also know people who live in dense close in suburbs, in walkable neighborhoods close to Metro, who regularly do the things you mention.

[b]The primary difference between them and people on CH is that they have an acceptable IB HS situation. Not lifestyle.[/b][/quote]

I'm not buying this.  My ex lives in Arlington and we share custody so my kids go to an Arlington public MS.  My life would be easier if I moved to Arlington to be closer to my ex but I'm not going.  The Arlington lifestyle doesn't appeal. I won't give up Hill density, longtime friends, neighbors, activities, lovely architecture, or my walkable/bikeable commute to a Congressional office building. My kids don't want me to move. [/quote]

Shocking that you think your ex's lifestyle sucks and yours is amazing, truly an unbiased assessment.  :roll:

I know a bunch of people in close in Maryland suburbs (Bethesda, Takoma Park, parts of Silver Spring, Hyattsville) who are NOT your ex, and they take Metro to work, can walk to restaurants and bars from their house, life in fairly dense neighborhoods (some in townhomes), go to museums and concerts, are very social, and lead very active lives. I know very few people who just stay home all the time.

I also know people on Capital Hill who don't go out much except to stuff associated with their kids' school or activities. Actually I know a lot of people like this on CH (which is where I live) because a lot of people here are very kid-focused and especially when kids are in elementary, they seem to drop a lot of their other social activity and just focus on family. I think part of the appeal of CH for people like this is that if you like your elementary, you can do all of this stuff on foot/bike, which is great. I think that is sometimes harder to do even in a dense, walkable suburb, though might be feasible if you were selective about your home (close to the elementary school) and selective about kid's activities (swimming at walkable pool, or mostly activities through the pool). You'd still probably drive more than you'd need to on CH.

But the idea that people in suburbs just stay home in their huge houses on huge lots in unwalkable neighborhoods, and people on CH are all universally going out to museums and concerts and restaurants all the time, is just untrue. The entire world is not defined by "people like you" and "people like your ex."[/quote]

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