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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I want to like Ellyn Satter, but I think the idea that children sneak and overeat sugary/caloric foods if you don’t regularly serve them as part of healthy meals is BULLLLLLLLLL. BULL. SO MUCH BULL.

Picture a small hill. This is the contribution of making something “forbidden.”

Picture Mount Everest. This is the contribution of the foods being highly palatable and the body being biologically wired to want them. [/quote]

As someone who struggled with binge eating and overcame it in adulthood, I can tell you you’re wrong! The reason is that things like Cheetos, cookies, etc actually dont taste that great and they don’t make you feel good, if you pay attention. So learning to tune into your body is what makes all the difference in the world.

Op I think you’re doing things right in terms of her eating but I’d be on the lookout for PCOS or high insulin. If her insulin is high, that’s what needs to be checked - not her weight - and that can be managed through meds, or more exercise, or other strategies. I still think you need to be very careful because you don’t want a kid to be obsessing about diabetes prevention either. But just food for thought that I think you have a good perspective but you still aren’t wrong that your instincts are saying something might be off here.[/quote]

Binge eating is a physiological disorder.  You likely would have been a binge eater regardless of what type of foods your parents had at home[/quote]

this is mostly true and does not contradict anything in my post. It is more about the restriction aspect.[/quote]

Parents don’t cause binge eating by telling their kid they can only have one piece piece of cake and not two or three. Or by not buying Cheetos except on road trips or whatever [/quote]

Yes, that can cause binge eating. [/quote]

No, that is learning to regulate sugary desserts, something no one needs any of. Eating 3 pieces of case is ENGAGING IN BINGE EATING and that is not something parents should be enabling. [/quote]

Agree. I think there is a lot of good to the Satter approach but some people erroneously take away that you shouldn't limit food at all. Of course that's ridiculous. I think where this can get hung up is if a person with a tiny appetite decides that "one serving" for their child is way smaller than is realistic. Or treating children differently because of their size -- the one you aren't worried about doesn't get much attention around food but the other one gets a lot of "are you sure you need that" comments or disapproving looks when they take a cupcake at a party. Serving reasonable amount of a varied diet at regular mealtimes and including "treat" foods as dessert of snacks occasionally to ALL is healthy. Your skinny kid doesn't need to binge on cookies anymore than your chubby one does.

The most important part of the Satter approach IMO is the structure. No snacks all the dang time. My kids get a snack at 3pm and then they have to wait until dinner. Then they are reasonably hungry, will eat most of what's served without issues, are satisfied and move on with the evening.

Occasionally when I'm serving something they really love and they scarf it down fast and want more, we'll ask them to pause and finish their salad. We explain that it takes a little while for their stomach and brain to communicate so it's important to give them time to talk. They both have ADHD and have difficulty with impulse control (as can DH who has impulsive eating issues) so we're always working on that. If they are still hungry for that food after they've paused and had some salad, and we have enough, then I will let them have a small 2nd serving. I want them to be tuned into and respectful of their appetites. On the flip side, if they tell me they are not hungry and only take a couple bites of dinner I don't argue with them about that. But, again with the structure, that means they won't eat until breakfast. [/quote]

Sattler’s philosophy is you don’t limit food at meal or snack time. This is her mantra:

• The parent is responsible for what, when, and where.
• The child is responsible for [b]how much [/b]and whether

I think this is ridiculous advice. Some kids when presented with food at mealtime will overeat. 
[/quote]

It's been a while since I read her but what I recall from "how much" was not that you have to provide unlimited amounts of everything on the table. Naturally in life you will only serve a certain amount that needs to be shared among all at the table. So if you made 4 pieces of chicken and everyone had one Satter's guidance is not that you should then be cooking more chicken because that is what the kid wants more of but that he should feel free to eat more of what else is being served.  [/quote]

Except that is impossible to do for every item on the table every time; cooking exact portions for everyone for everything.  You have to and should say no if they are asking for too much.  This is subjective but it is the only way if you have a child with a tendency to overeat.  Since their brain isn’t getting the right signal from their stomach, their brain just has to learn through practice and guidance with portion size how much is “enough” [/quote]

I would add the average kid who goes to school and sees friends and family regularly has treats and such at minimum 2-3 times per week from outside their house.  [/quote]

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