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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here. I had a conversation with my dad back in December about me not feeling close to my dad as I think weshould. His response is that [b]I am an adult now[/b]. I understand this, however he does not call or text to see how I am doing. I called him during the holidays and he wanted to know why I was calling(to wish him a Merry Christmas of course) and he it seemed like he just followed up with me out of courtesy and it took him a week to do so. 
My sibling is having a college send off/grad party once they return from the cruise and I am thinking about canceling my plans to attend(as I was scheduled to stay with them for a week due to me living a plane ride away). I don't want to be in a place when I'm only wanted or needed for others convenience or to make them look good. [/quote]

What is the bold supposed to mean? You’re an adult so now he doesn’t have to be a father to you? Ok so then will he behave as a family member, friend,.. stranger?

Is your biological mom still in the picture? I am guessing there is resentment from your dad to your biological mom that you remind him of. Or a history of your mom/previous marriage that he doesn’t want to be reminded of.

Maybe it’s time to grieve and find another village. I was excluded from a family vacation back to my parents’ homeland - a major trip with 12 hour plane ride that they will never go on again because now they’re too old or whatever - while my 3 sibs, all their kids, my aunt and uncle went. They have photos of that trip around their place, lots of group photos with the fam.

Now that my parents need more support due to medical needs, they turned to me for help. I did for a bit, because I live the closest physically to them. But I was one carrying the load. My sibs were too busy, too far. Etc. It was all on me.

Eventually I said F*** this. I wasn’t relevant as a family member when they took that once in a lifetime vacation but now I am because they need support? 
[/quote]

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