Reply to Envy of other women’s husbands

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Envy is never a good look. Work on making your family, your marriage and your dh the best it can be.

Btw, I'm married to one of those guys and I'm no where near as hot as DH. He was more focused on personality, good upbringing and picking an emotionally mature mate.

Also, some of those guys? Their wives are the ones who have turned them into a total catch. [/quote]

Curious about this. I’m dating a wonderful kind man behind closed doors - great sex, he takes care of me emotionally, we have fun together. But in public he doesn’t come across very confident and definitely isn’t a high earner or have high social status. However, I am confident and in a public facing job and get told I’m beautiful often. Will he get more confident over time? Or will this lead to resentment?[/quote]
 maybe he's not an extrovert? If you are looking for a man to be like that, then maybe he's not for you.[/quote]m

He’s definitely not an extrovert that’s true. I don’t need for him to be a big talker but don’t want his confidence to shrink either. [/quote]
he's not for you.  I think he will disappoint you.

A guy I dated told me that I had too high expectations of him.  To me, it wasn't high expectations, but to him it was.  I've since learned that I should not expect a man to change his personality.  All you do is set yourself up for disappointment.

If he's happy the way he is, then don't expect him to change.  You guys just aren't compatible.[/quote]

I think confidence is important because insecurity can lead to all kinds of issues, including resentment and competitiveness.  But, confidence doesn't necessarily mean being the life of the party.  He could just be a strong, silent type.  Those are my favorites personally - I don't trust the guys who come into a room glad-handing and trying to charm everyone.  [/quote]

There are DHs who are extremely charming (even if it is just one on one, and particularly with women) in person, and behind closed doors, they are horrible to live with - and not because of their wives, but because the DH is really an a-hole.  You would never know it by seeing that kind of DH out and about, because he is very good at being charming.  It is an art.

Stick with the guys who are not "too" friendly, but are confident in their own skin - to not try to compete with the wife and try to make her feel like crap.  I have seen it, it ain't handsome.  At all. If a guy thinks his wife is hotter, or he is is sensitive about his dad stomach or receding hairline, or God knows what, he will be a real a-hole behind closed doors.[/quote]

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