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[quote=Anonymous]OP here. Thank you for your replies, well the majority of them, I’ll say.

I completely understand how some say this was not just a one time thing. It was my immediate question too. I have had full unfettered access to his phone and email and have viewed every single communication. I cross referenced with our cell bill as well as there is no communication before or after, just when she was included in company-wide emails. She is out of the country and no longer with the company. He doesn’t do social media and she’s not on his LinkedIn. Sure, she could reach out in some way and maybe he has some secretive burner phone hidden somewhere, but my broken heart is telling me I don’t think they’re in touch. That’s all I can go on for now.

We are both in individual counseling and have started marital counseling. We’re reading books on infidelity. We are communicating civilly (enough) and having talks about the future but aren’t hanging out together after the kids are asleep or anything. He’s in the guest room and we just tell the kids it’s because he has started snoring. They’re too young to pick up on much of this anyway. We put on smiles when we need to do for family events and social things.

I am still very unsure what to do. We have a lot of friends and acquaintances surprisingly who have dealt with infidelity. They have chosen different outcomes over time., it hasn’t immediately been divorced in most cases. I have confided in a few friends but otherwise want to keep it private. For now we still agree being a family unit is best for our kids and our finances and our daily logistical life. I don’t know if our marriage can recover, time will tell I suppose.

Thank you for those who have offered advice or just a note of solidarity or support. I feel very isolated and hurt and the kindness of strangers is nice during hard times. [/quote]

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